It's not what you think

If someone had told me that at 31 I would be introducing Vinyl into the married bedroom scene, I would have snorted out loud.

Me? Vinyl?

Seriously, that is like 2500 workouts away.

But, low and behold, last Friday I found myself in the vinyl aisle at our local Target.

Didn't know they carried stuff like that?

Oh yeah! And it comes in different sizes.

Let's see........Twin, Full, Queen and King.

Yep. Our Queen mattress has a vinyl cover underneath our fabulous jersey sheets.
Nope. We are not a bunch of weirdos looking to spice up the love life.
Yep. The kiddos still manage to find their way back to our bedroom in the dark, in the middle of the night, and like clockwork, proceed to pee the bed.

Over.
And over.
And over again.

So I gave in, and purchased vinyl for our bedroom. It stinks and it makes noise, but it is protecting our beloved bed from the unstoppable bladders that are our children.

When I was twenty-something and getting ready to marry my best friend, I had visions of satin sheets, chocolate covered strawberrries, and candlelight.

Now I have vinyl sheets, chocolate milk, and two tiny pairs of feet digging into both of my tired hips.


Who needs birth control?

Smart Like His Mama

So last night the boys and I were cuddling in bed (a favorite pastime of ours).

The darling husband asked me to put Speed Racer into the dvd player. I told him I was sooooo tired and asked if he could do it instead.

The husband walked out of the bedroom to check on something.

Superman whispered "You better do it mommy, because he's the daddy and he told you to put the movie in."

I turned to Superman and slowly asked, "Do you think that daddy is in charge of mommy?"

Superman pondered for a few seconds......."No mommy. I think you are in charge of Daddy."

I smothered Superman with a zillion kisses and pronounced him a genius.

Darling Husband walked into the bedroom and Superman and I giggled hysterically.


And yes. I did end up explaining to my very brilliant, yet very literal five year old that no one is in charge. "Mommy and Daddy are a team" I told him. We work together.



Still...........................

MIA

I know, I know.

You've been barely getting by without my witty, funny, delicious posts.

But.
I'm.
Back.

I am going to try this again, this blogging deal. I am going to put in some effort and hopefully grow a loyal and entertained audience. I am going to hone my skills as a writer while I share my truths, however bitter or sweet.

So welcome back!

And thank you to Lindsay at Designs by Splat for giving this place a much needed face lift.

Woo hoo!